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Staying sane using the S.E.T. Method

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Please be warned – this is a vulnerable post and even a tad risque in what I share if you get to the end (hangs her head with a laugh). Definitely proceed with a sense of humour.

As we greet the end of January with the delightful promise of new energy and vitality as the Water Tiger pounces on the scene as Chinese New Year unfolds tomorrow, it’s suddenly time for my next insider musings.

Recently I had a wake up reminder (aka love nudge) about how I really do attempt to approach every day. Sometimes it has to be a very conscious application to align with my motto of #LiveLightLiveLarge …and other times it seeps effortlessly into the air I breathe. Today’s musing is about needing to consciously activate the S.E.T Method to regain my own sanity!

As my Nan would say, “pull yourself towards yourself.”

Such an apt saying for this months sharing.

Grab something to drink for your 9-minute read – and please remember to drop me a mail to say how you might tap into the S.E.T Method

When we reached the last few months of ’21 and I took occupation of a gorgeous new flat in Edinburgh, I was deeply inspired from the inside out to write and share more with you. I decided these musings were only going to be for my insider subscribers, and I started putting a lot of energy and personal sharing into them. Your response has been simply phenomenal and your messages kept me inspired to keep at it and for that I am deeply grateful. I post somewhat vulnerable musings from my life, at age 53 and doing my best to live my best life possible with ALL the ups and downs, laughter and ugly cries that go with that. How do I approach life, what do I do for healing, closure, when things go completely awry, and perhaps even this year you will get some dating laughs.


You can read all of those past musings on my blog here with the password LOVE (Yes, in capitals)

Today, speeding northwards on a train to Glasgow and then the most beautiful trip to Oban, I am drawn to share a story from a few weeks ago, as January started unfolding. That Highland Fling ritual I shared last year, had flung a new interesting soul my way, and the précis version of it kind of reads like this…

Mutual client friend has inspired thought to introduce us
Meet interesting soul Mr X
Lure of a kiss and a river
Mountain adventures
Soul connections
Dreaded “C” x 2
Me impersonating Florence Nightingale
Experiencing my own version of Outlander
New festive plans required
Island adventures
Followed by… well, what can I say other than …followed by January.
The oddest of months, right?
For you too?

Here goes: Over New Year I set up my gorgeous new writing and retreat base in this great company of Mr X on the Sacred Isle of Iona and then two weeks later, headed back into Edinburgh city mid January. The dance between the two landscapes suits me very well for this next 3M chapter.

Island girl and city gal. I think I love this vibe…

Onto the point of todays sharing of my SET Method. I’m back in the city and lapping up the New Year. While it’s been a deeply introspective and quiet start for many of you, mine was a lot more active and focused. January turned out to be a profound month of personal productivity, purpose, energy, and clarity about where I’m headed with my passion business and working with women on the threshold of making courageous leaps! I was meeting up with all my wonderful Edinburgh friends, connecting with my local writing group, signing new private coaching clients, booking my Iona Retreats, filling our Greek and Italian Writing Retreats for summer and getting on with my awesome life.

After all I do live an awesome life and after almost 2.5 years of healing and being single I honestly believe sharing it with someone else is a delicious cherry on top – not something to hanker after and chase, yet something I am embracing and calling in. So when it came crashing into my life on all fronts in November, I paid attention, said yes and made space to show up big time.

But after the précis shared above, January has found me sitting with a profound sense of WTF happened, mixed with some sadness and heaps of confusion. I’m missing a beat somewhere. My heart and soul is clearly going through a deep healing process right now. I’m experiencing the gift of what happens when another soul helps us along our journey to become the best version of ourselves.

So my saddened heart story was unfolding alongside all the wonderful vibrant energy. It definitely was NOT derailing me. I have luckily been able to somehow see the experience of that encounter with Mr X as existing in a beautiful metallic singing bowl. At one point that singing bowl emanated the most beautiful music and then this month it has been sitting patiently (mmmm, not always!) and quietly waiting to burst with sound once again. Yet all the while being pretty contained and not spilling out tooooooo much into the rest of my life.

If you have been watching my Instagram lives, you might already know my THEME WORDS for this year are TRUST and EXPANSION.
Trust feels aligned to this lesson and insight for my heart and soul.
Expansion feels very aligned to my business ventures and passion projects.
TRUST means if something or someone is meant to be then nothing will keep it from you, and if something or someone is not meant to be, nothing can make it so.

But that would be far too easy if we could LIVE that in every, single. flipping moment right? Cue some dramatic “dum dum dum” music as I get struck down by the joy and irony of BEING HUMAN!
Thanks universe. No easy ride on this one then?

The singing bowl metaphor went awry and it started leaking!
Messy flowing emotions everywhere.
Feeling distracted, a tad distraught, wanting answers, insights, wanting outcomes…a ‘what the hell is happening here’ kind of vibe.

And here comes the ridiculous laugh at my expense …

I found myself starting to check social media about 20 times day, checking my phone to see ‘who’ was online, behaving like a totally numbskull!

Giving a lot of my energy and time to…well nothing really. Cos nothing was happening other than in my head. The intensity of connection was replaced by nada.

My S.E.T METHOD is how I approach life from both the macro and micro level. Looking at what you need to let go of so that you bring your energy into the present, and from that point you create a fabulous future. It’s the motto of my life and the reason for my business. Letting go, closure, forgiveness, healing, moving on with energy in tact and being able to SIT IN THE GAP that exists between No Longer and Not Yet.

At a daily level I use a slightly more practical approach that can be a faster way to clean up and tackle each day with intention.
S.E.T Method stands for the following:

S = SUCK
E = EQUILIBIRUIM
T = TANTALISING

After about three days of my ridiculous energy-dispersing behaviour, I burst out laughing at myself and decided I needed to put into practice what I know.
AGAIN dear human.

Me muttering to myself, “Kate come on. It’s time to ask yourself the series of question you live by. Let’s get going already…”

  1. WHAT IS SUCKING YOUR PRECIOUS ENERGY?
  2. WHAT WILL BRING YOU SOME EQUILIBRIUM?
  3. WHAT IS TANTALISING TO SAY YES TO RIGHT NOW?

Quite evocative things to ponder with no hint of wishy washy in sight. No Grey!
I needed to stop the obsessions at play under the first SUCK question! Fast.

***FACING THE SUCK
1. I was letting social media eat my time and energy. Constantly checking Insta, Facebook, messages, mail. You know this routine right? I took action and simply muted those certain Instagram Stories and Posts, so they were no longer in my face every time I ventured online. I made a promise to myself to stay off Social Media altogether for 24 hours – something I do regularly but hadn’t been sticking to. DUH!
Next, I put my phone on airplane mode so no one could bug me and I couldn’t go down the rabbit hole for several hours and could focus on re-building my energy internally with nothing SUCKING at it.

Off with you oh comparison social media monster! Sometimes knowing who is doing what, when, where and with whom can be destructive and energy sucking. It is like sugar and alcohol – hard to resist when it’s in the system. Control, Alt, Delete.

2. I fasted for the rest of the day and next morning to get my sugar cravings under control

3. I wrote a quick action plan for the following week to make sure there was nothing pulling at my work energy or fallen off the radar

Ok – I was instantly more in control of the leaking bucket.


***EMBRACING THE EQUILIBIRUM
This is about doing the things that we know are good for our body, heart and soul. The things we ideally need to do often and consistently in order to embrace that sense of calm, balance, and poised equilibrium.

1. I did some yin yoga at home to calm my nervous system

2. I sat and wrote in my journal whole sipping hot lemon ‘n ginger water

3. I energetically tuned into what I really needed to do until I got an answer – ah so simple – walk the city in the morning light and go sit in a church to feel the presence of spirit again.

With that insight I got dressed and embarked on one of the most beautiful walks as the dawn light was playing over Edinburgh. The silhouettes of the buildings and trees were exquisite and healing. I felt gratitude returning to my insides. I walked for hours and then found myself in the main city cathedral. As I walked in the choir was practicing and it was like the angels of the world were singing just to me. I sat and meditated intuitively using the infinity symbol before the service started. Full to the brim with exquisite architecture, healing voices and a calmness seeping out of my pores, I stepped back out into the glorious sunshine.

***YES TO THE TANTALISING

The third part of this three-fold method is about saying YES to some tantalizing aspects– juicy, delicious and energizing things that makes you beam with joy and smile from ear to ear. It has more energy and vibrancy than the embracing of equilibrium. So now, what was I to do?

1. Tantalizing Trick
One of my tricks in new cities to visit the grand old hotels to get a real feeling of the city from yester-year. Just for a simple cup of glorious coffee. They come complete with excellent staff, silver service, in glorious surroundings and far outweigh popping into a regular high street chain for a quick brew. It’s a ritual of immense delight for me.

I found myself walking with a skip in my step to the beautiful Balmoral Hotel on Princes St.

A kilt-wearing doorman (which always makes me smile) greets you and ushers you inside and that morning I was taken to the Palm Room, specifically for morning coffee. Another tartan-clad waiter escorted me to a “throne –like” chair from which I could simply bask in the beauty of this exquisite room. Everything was simply tantalizing – the fine crockery with a delicate green palm pattern, the silver coffee pot and the accompanying Scottish heather shortbread biscuits.

The room had an exquisite tree be-jeweled with fairy lights – I felt like a queen. See pics below. Of course, I had my journal and pen with me so wrote a little bit while basking in the regal Scottish energy.

I have also been activating and stepping up my energy to embrace being more “Queen-like.” This means truly and honestly embodying who I am and what I know, being able to be of real service to people who need my unique kind of help and support. Also knowing that I am ready to call in a “King” to take up place on the throne beside me. I am working on that rather than reducing my standards of what I truly desire for myself. Tough one!

Calling in an aligned partner is a want, a delicious desire, not a need. I come from the premise of living a full life that can get even sweeter with a witness, partner and adventure playmate. I reveled in sitting on that chair in the Balmoral drinking my coffee and dreaming my next phase of life into being, while just savoring every single sip of coffee.

2. Tantalizing Treats
I can’t really believe I’m going to share this right now – but my PROMISE is to be vulnerable and share ALL the ups and downs, highs and lows and be REAL for you when penning these musings!

Walking home to the West End along Princes Street after my morning adventure, I walked the route I have walked a gazillion times living in this city. I walked past the Ann Summers shop – only today I walked IN and straight to the back of the store. If you know what this store is, you know exactly what I bought. Nudge nudge wink wink. If you don’t – use your imagination or Google what the store sells. It was time for some self tantalizing. Oh there is so much I can share from my life but suffice it to say that it was time to take matters into my own hands so to speak, and shift some of this energy I had been grappling with.

Ha ha – yes my mum reads this newsletter too! (Hangs heads and laughs at self on the train as I write this.) Thank goodness I can laugh at myself! Can you?

3. Tantalizing Tootsies
Next I did everything in my power to get my sizzling hot salsa shoes from South Africa. Those sexy heels have been waiting ever so patiently for me. Living out of a suitcase #LocationFree meant that every item of clothing I travelled with for the past 6 years, needed to be clever and multipurpose. Salsa shoes can only be used for dancing, so they never made it into my suitcase and remained in South Africa with my art. Being reunited with them now, thanks to a sweet young friend who popped them in his suitcase, I am armed with the right shoes and my toes at the ready when classes open up again this week in my neighborhood.
I see some tantalizing moves coming up soon – ooh la la. Cue sexy music this time.

So if you made it this far into the read – I am wondering how YOU are going to utilize the S.E.T METHOD to stay on top of your own world. It’s so simple …

Get rid of what is SUCKING at your energy
Embrace and restore inner EQUILIBRIUM
Say yes to something TANTALIZING

I hope you got a wee laugh today and another practical nugget to use practically in your life. Till next month, enjoy February with the new Tiger energy in the month of LOVE.

With Lightness,
Kate

READY TO EMBRACE YOUR NEXT CHAPTER?

I am fascinated with helping you make courageous leaps at significant moments in life transitions. Perhaps it’s a big birthday beckoning soon, a new chapter approaching, a project ending, your home being sold, an empty nest looming, divorce or death to process and you need a fresh perspective to help you close out the old and welcome in the new? I am also currently mentoring new coaches getting started with their coaching business models – with over 19 years of coaching, mentoring, speaking, facilitating experience as well as 5 published book and a movie under my professional belt – I find it super easy to support new coaches in the right direction to gain traction, impact and clients FAST!

Please reach out to me directly on kate@kate-emmerson.com to start a conversation.

PLUG IN OR PUSH OFF – it’s all about RESPECT

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Plug in or Push off!

My October newsletter comes from Edinburgh and it’s a quick lesson from my recent life. I hope you find something in it for yourself today.

Grab your tea coffee, wine or juice and enjoy a 9 minute read.

Plug IN or push OFF
It was the joy of truth when we need it …and boy did I ever need it. Is there anyone out there telling you just how things are? My recent session went like this.

“Why are you there, what’s your connection to Scotland Kate?” he asked me.

“Well, I have always loved it from my first visit over 30 years ago. I feel spiritually connected to it, love the drama of the awesome landscape, have heritage here and my third name is Walker. I just love this country”

“Well… it doesn’t look like it. You are kind of being disrespectful to the Scots right now and you need to plugin. You have to match the energy of the country and what it epitomizes and then work outwards from there!”

Eeeck. Slap. Reality check …and so began the session with my healer. We used this insight as our starting point.

I was told in no uncertain terms that I was not FULLY plugged into where I currently am. I’m not in Greece where the sun and warm water surround me – I’m in Scotland. Plant myself there or leave. Simple.

Ouch.

Pathetic

I typically pride myself on being wherever I am, and living #LocationFree means I embrace and adapt to changes quite fast – USUALLY.

I have chosen Scotland for this winter 21/22.

Brrr!

Double Brrrrrrr!

Triple rain!

Quadruple grey!

I LOVE Scotland.

In my September newsletter I shared how I approach life using the 3m Principle. Readers LOVED it. I was quite taken aback by the overwhelming response. Oh yeah, baby – living it up in Edinburgh for this particular 3m and getting others to think about the 3m approach too. I even got clients coming to work with me on the 3m process.

Yet suddenly I wasn’t plugged in, tuned in or aligned. My entire body was reacting to it!

I was trying – doing my best. So I thought. But it had started…the familiar pull of the “hole” about a week after I moved into my gorgeous apartment. I think most of us have our own version of “the hole.” Whether it’s full-blown Black Dog, (aka depression) or anything on that spectrum where things are just totally out of whack and off-kilter. At some point the world tilts a degree too far and we can all lurch there.

The short and sweet lesson and reason for today’s sharing is simply:
BE WHERE YOU ARE AND PLUG IN … OR PUSH OFF!

If my story or the way I look at life helps YOU to do something differently in your life – how wonderful. Clients, colleagues and friends tell me that my musings help them! So I keep showing up and sharing.

Warning: Part of who I am is to share honestly. I always have. From the awesome highs to the awful lows. The good and the bad. Middle ground is challenging for me. Sometimes life is easy and sometimes it’s shite. I grapple hugely with self-worth, intermittent depression and sometimes totally lose my way. I also have huge dreams and ideals supported by courage, honesty and freedom as my top values. So I get up again and keep looking ahead to the light.

Charlie Mackesy is one of my go- to-reads to his enormous reminder of self-compassion!

Sharing my life helps me – and I know it helps others out there.

I also know being vulnerable makes me kinder, more real and ultimately better at helping/ coaching/ mentoring others. If you want to read more about what was going on and love hearing about how I handle stuff because you can translate it to something useful for yourself- then grab some tea or wine and walk a little further into the story with me.

THE PULL OF THE HOLE

Before my session with my trusted energetic healer, I could feel myself edging closer to the hole. It was leering at me from up ahead and I had a clear visual image. It was almost laughing at me. Challenging me. For a while thought I was on top of it all. I told myself I was managing to circumnavigate it this time.

A few factors had simultaneously prodded some deep patterns awake that ensure I question my self worth, ignite my imposter syndrome and make me question everything about life and my choices. I was veering off course and denial was kicking in.

I was feeling:

Little

Invisible

Tired

Lacking

Aching

Impatient

Uncertain

Hopeless

I had just made awesome yet mammoth decisions, implemented changes and was at a huge crossroads (like many folk in these times). I was aware of it and how these cycles have sneaked up on me and attacked me in the past. I reached out. First I got some body support. Remember that neighbourhood FB group I mentioned as a way of connecting in to a new area – well someone recommended an osteopath just two minutes walk away from my home.

He gently eased my body back into shape with a twist here and a prod there while asking me some tough questions to ponder. Grrrr. Don’t you both love and hate it when the right buttons are lovingly pushed?

He was suggesting my body pain had been “torqued” (more like tortured) by all the emotional stuff going on. Go figure.

Nothing was cogging together. No flow.
Muchos pain and muchos buckets of tears!
Copious wine!

I also booked a session with a homeopath for another layer of support, but had to wait three weeks to see her. “Oh I’ll be fine till then,” I thought delusionally and told those who asked.

I often wonder why humans tend to underestimate the gravity of change. Even when we have willingly put ourselves in the situation – all the other parts of our body, heart and soul still have to catch up and land in the same place. That can take some time to settle through all the different layers.

While part of me thought I was living the life in Edinburgh, embracing my latest 3m – a larger part of me was pretty much running away, staying home most of the time. Hiding out a bit. Being mean to myself and berating my choices when things weren’t shifting as fast as I had hoped.

My timing vs. diving timing.

Ego and impatience vs. source.

I had rented this gorgeous flat in the city centre and already started building a writing community. That should have been enough! Then I had booked a writing retreat to be run within a month of moving into my flat. And cold water swims, salsa, and attending other writing events. Meeting many new folk. Crazy right? But I wanted to connect and meet lots of people and live my very best 3m dammit.

I thought I had made peace with where I was.

But that hole was now becoming way more magnetic and it was swirling a devilish dance – beckoning me in just one more time. Maybe that hole is my version of crack or heroin? My own addiction. A way to pull me off course and keep me small?

But most people don’t share this stuff right? They only put out the brave and bold stuff to the world. OR the front of social media. Truth is, I didn’t want my people to worry. But people who care about you know when stuff isn’t right. Instinctively. I can’t get anything past my mum and close friends.

Even so, sometimes it just feels easier to retreat. I was getting dangerously close to succumbing to that hole.

And then I stumbled and fell in.

Splat.

I was feeling shocking at all levels. My moods were erratic, I was drinking tooooo much wine (and could no longer blame lockdown right) and spending too much time at home on my own in my lovely nest. Every night. I even slept and read for one whole day during the week – simply not able to face the world and canceled all appointments. My mental health was not coping. My emotional body was aching. Muscles and joints were sore. All too much. I kept seeing the osteopath as I knew it was helping.

A day or two after succumbing to the hole, the homeopath session finally arrived. I know that modality helps me at a cellular level to balance hormones and mood. Contrary to popular belief, homeopathy can work with both acute and chronic issues, and I needed some fast-dose remedies. I have not had a general GP for more than 30 years other than to get blood tests signed off or asthma pumps when needed. My go-to form of support is to treat “like with like”. I trust the field of homeopathy instinctively. You know what works for you too right?

It was Friday. After a morning session crying and wincing on the osteopath’s table, I then blabbed for 90 minutes to the homeopath. I didn’t care how crazy I sounded – I just purged it ALL out. I swear I went through a tube of mascara in one day.

What a relief to be heard and seen with zero judgment.

Like a giant hug from a teddy bear!

I was sent home with some acute remedy doses of GOLD – even just the thought of imbibing gold (known as Aurum) made me feel like anything was perhaps possible again. I had a ladder out the hole again. “Gold” was designed to pull all of me back together. That was the problem- I felt like I was totally split and none of me was in the same place. I could feel my energetic, physical, emotional and mental bodies were all swirling around and none of them were aligned IN my body.

Literally, the next morning I woke up feeling a slight shift in my energy. I had also gone to bed repeating gratitude and prayers. I got up and cleaned my flat from one end to the next. A deep clean. I tackled it with energy and the intention to literally shift the space. I even turned my mattress over. Swept, dusted, hoovered and mopped every nook and cranny. Washed, ironed and replaced bedding. I loved every single corner of my home knowing I was loving myself stronger too. Scrubbing clean and starting afresh. Then fell into a deep, therapeutic sleep for a few hours.

It was a small turning point and one step on the ladder.

Three days later was that healing session where I was told I am not plugged-in to where I am! It was all about timing as I was now in a place to hear it clearly. My body and emotional state was a lot better from three days of homeopathic treatments.

I GOT IT.

As he spoke those words to me, I could see how I had been saying one thing but feeling another. Longing for the warmth, longing for sunshine, longing for the Aegean and long days of light. Even thinking of how much I loved short, colourful linen dresses and flip flops, oversized sunglasses and a wide brim hat. Berry lipstick and lingering kisses. Longing for anywhere energetically that wasn’t Scotland.

So I simply wasn’t aligned in what I was saying, doing and believing. No wonder I was being tossed around in the washing machine of life.

Sometimes we just need to hear it like it is.

It was PLUG IN OR PUSH OFF time!

Align or release.

What’s it going to be?

Truth with compassion and understanding is a powerful trait.

Either be here fully or don’t. We can’t be here wishing we were somewhere else. Or with someone else. And that’s the truth of life. You have to fully embrace where you are – the job, relationship, country or any situation you find yourself in. RIGHT NOW.

The choice is to embrace it, make peace with it and love it to ensure you re-plug in or do something to change it or leave.

BE WHERE YOU ARE.

Simple but not always easy.

We need to know how to move between expansion and contraction. I had to remember to match the energy of Scotland and embrace it before I could ever hope to have an impact on it or be impacted by it.

Embrace then shift.

I have painstakingly climbed up all the rungs on the ladder out the hole, and I do feel a bit tender and vulnerable. I also feel it’s important to share. Sharing might help someone else. Maybe you? There is NO weakness in asking for help, and we might need it from a couple of sources.

Do you want a chuckle now?

As soon as I plugged in and embraced the shift internally, I was able to play it out externally. The ”girlie” reality is that I realized I needed some sassy clothing to embrace winter in Scotland in the city.

Not just gym gear, jeggings, trainers and bulky three layers to cold-proof myself.

I needed to have some clothing to help me feel sassy to entice me back out. To dare to venture out at night for a glass of wine or the local salsa classes.

I realised I had been dreading going out or felt kind of frumpy when I did. Yikes – no wonder I wasn’t plugged into and respecting Scotland.

So here is the trick – I had to get the internal ENERGETIC shift first, and then I could spiral it through to my outside world.

As a minimalist with a capsule wardrobe, I was taught by my stylist friends to be clever about mix ‘n matching. Everything works cohesively to ensure the minimum number of clothes that can be worn in several different ways.

I chose winter neutrals with a pop of colour. Black cream and silver with cerise.

Sexy Boots with a thin flash of Zebra pattern for attitude

Amazing leather biker jacket with a floaty dress

Sensual cream blouse that fits perfectly

A sexy skirt above the knee worn with stockings

Soft cuddly jumper (to emulate that kind hug)

Fluffy cashmere pompom hat and gloves.

Ooh la la I think I’m ready.

I have always heard the expression… “There is no such thing as bad weather in Scotland, just bad clothing.”

HELLO UNICORN ENERGY!

This morning I put on my short skirt and asymmetrically-cut fluffy jumper and literally pranced out the house. I even bought an umbrella so I don’t have to think about a clumpy raincoat all the time.

I strutted down the road and literally felt people respond to me. The Scottish national animal is the unicorn and I’m calling in that feeling of possibility, playfulness and magic. People respond to energy right – it’s not about what you look like but what you feel like. And boy do I feel some sense of swagger back in my step.

I might never fully know why this particular transition hit me so hard. So many complex factors came together all at once. But I do know that alignment is key. I have made new promise and commitment to my support team to have quarterly tune-ups or more where needed! Sessions booked in advance! The aim is to tweak ahead of time to help me walk around the hole and not fall IN it too often. And back on track with being mentored.

And now I’m going to pop on a lovely black wool coat, embrace the cold air and go out dancing.

Wishing you light at the end of your tunnel today
Love Kate


DO YOU NEED TO PLUG IN NOW?

Are you blessed with someone in your life that reflects yourself back to yourself, steering around your blind spots? A trusted advisor or wise mentor who has been where you are and who has skills and ability to get you to where you want to go?

Perhaps you know I’m the person who will get you! It would be an honour to help you through this chapter of transition in your life to find your sassy self again. If you happen to come work with me in either Edinburgh or Iona over the next few months, you might get to appreciate my capsule wardrobe with your own eyes! No there’s a thought.

Pop me a mail about exploring working with me on a personal retreat or a 3-month silo to embrace and implement changes in life and business.

Please mail me directly to set up a chat on kate@kate-emmerson.com

Thunder Rain … by Kate

By Insights to help you #quickshift, Transformational Journeys, Transformational thoughts

A poem inspired by an unexpected storm on my Greek island in the midst of summer. Being dragged out of bed by thundering noise suddenly brought these words tumbling out of me – and I have not written any form of “poetry” since 26 – almost half my life ago!

Thunder Rain

Rain cleansing broken hearts as dawn light appears
Water healing pain, buried not forgotten
Flowing through the lives
Of everyone deep in sorrow
Tumbling words in a gasping gush of water

Fumbling “I’m sorry” in a muddy pool
Wind curling ferociously around feathered leaves
Thunder beings crashing through the panes
Beckoning get up get up GET UP

As swallows take flight in bursts of energetic black
The tall sky keeps throwing off its cleansing cloak
Begging us
To wash away the stains, just for today

by Kate Emmerson

Poem inspired by gorgeous rain on a Greek island in the middle of summer. See my pic taken from my apartment

Kate Emmerson

The profundity of asking a question that resonated!

By Insights to help you #quickshift, Transformational thoughts

The profundity of asking a question that resonated with you!
I posted this question on Facebook for both myself and my clients. Having just come through and out of my own inner “Irma” – the hurricane devastating the Carribean and Florida – and witnessing clients all over the world being squished, squashed, and squelched, bobbing up for some beautiful, deep breaths and breathtaking views before being swept under again – I posed this question to my tribe.

“Anyone else out there being a bit sideswiped by life at the moment? Whether your energy levels, financial, feeling disconnected, battling to get clarity on a way forward etc etc etc? And if so how are YOU best riding that uncomfortable wave? Would really love some input from you …”
UPDATE a couple hours later: so I asked this inquiry both for myself and also for many of my clients who are just in a somewhat very transitional space right now – shuffling, stuck, overwhelmed, unsure, then surges of energy and inspiration, followed by doubt, lack of confidence etc etc. Loving ALL your answers here – love my FB family around the globe!!

 

Here is the list that exploded on my timeline – deep sources of inspiration and ideas. Perhaps ONE is for you today.

Piet Filmalter Blendid.co.za …try it out – healthy as ever, taste great, and very easy for lazy/in-a-hurry type of person. And those days where you need to operate on a higher level, Provigil – if you can afford it or get a prescription for it.
Shelley Walters Sleep. Zzz
Sandy Bisschoff Trying to live in the moment and go with the flow, taking each day as it comes. I know that it’s temporary and I’ll have energy and direction again soon. Also reading Eckhart Tolle’s Power of Now (for the first time!) which is helping
Marilu Meiring For me it was realizing that by doing things in my own strength, is what quickly exhausts me. I’ve always believed in God but it was a relationship I neglected. Recently I decided to start to invest and prioritized my relationship (and understanding) of God again, I stepped into a world of peace that no matter what, gives me the power to let go and trust that all things work together for good.
Kate Emmerson yes I too need to be connected to spirit – if I am unplugged that’s when all my “drama” starts. Weirdly enough JUICING gets me reconnected, followed by Yoga. It’s like a fast track queue to spirit for me
Marilu Meiring That’s fabulous  What helps me is to know that I’m truly loved by Spirit and that only good things are intended for my life. So even in waiting (or with nothing happening), it is intended for my good and that is a comforting believe to hold on to.
Fran Stephanie Fainman I did the art of living foundation happiness program, where I learned a fabulous Kriya technique and pranayama breath work, which shifts energy very quickly. Sending hugs
Justine Visser Stay in the moment, meditate and remember, it will pass♡ and I promise it does, just another shift in your ascension process
Terry Stallard Just had a “crash n burn” with health..and income…
1)Got off conveyer belt of busy-ness and false stimulants (sugar and caffeine)
2) Taking time to rest and “be still” …definitely re-connect with God
3) Changing lifestyle…healthy diet….
4) Simplifying lifestyle….living within means..keeping out of debt
5) Exploring new ways of doing business..learn, read, learn…and possibly start writing….
Fran Stephanie Fainman I did the art of living foundation happiness program, where I learned a fabulous Kriya technique and pranayama breath work, which shifts energy very quickly. Sending hugs
Justine Visser Maybe this will help;
A sense of being held back. Many of us are feeling the sensation of something holding us back, from doing what we know we should be doing. Or coming up just short no matter how hard we try. Or procrastinating even though we may have a bit more clarity on what we feel we should be doing. We have had some very creative moments, but at large we still have that feeling that we can’t really get going. We don’t seem to be able to build any momentum to actually get started on our new projects and ideas for our soul mission.
That may be because on a physical level we still need to sleep a lot to process all the changes and integrate the light. While from a soul level, something seems to hold us back and prevent us from moving forward with it. We don’t know why but we have the feeling that we are still waiting for something before we go ahead. And we are. We are being asked to work through our core wounds first and to connect with the people around us who we are meant to connect with from all over the planet. We are building ourselves a strong foundation to support us and then propel us forward when the right time comes.
The Universal energies are aligning now for the big shifts to come. All this delaying has the purpose to fully bring us into perfect inner balance. The balance between aloneness and community, between the masculine and the feminine energies within, between being and doing, between giving and receiving. We must trust that we will get the energetic push to move forward, as soon as we are ready. This is the ultimate letting go of control and letting Source work through us and guide us.
Some upcoming dates to take note of:
September 6: Full Moon,
September 21 -25, including:
September 22 – Equinox and September 23 – Cosmic Trigger, Timeline Shift
December 21 – 25, including:
December 21- Solstice and December 23 – Cosmic Trigger, Timeline Shift
Welcome to a new way of living
Come join us: https://www.facebook.com/groups/anewwayofliving/
John Addey Come for tea
Cheryl Reum So many external influences of chaos it has to have an effect. We are one with our Universe. The Slight Edge Jeff Olsen, a delightful reminder of the control of small matters sees huge results. Sleep, 8 hours is my quota. Walk minimum 5000 steps a day. Eat a little something Nice! Chuck the to do lists and complete what can be done in flow. Read” One Thing” and practice it. Gary Keller. And Smile
Craig K. Whitehead I’m with Marilu Meiring here. Throughout the recent storms of life my faith has anchored me in confidence knowing that I am not alone or going through this without guidance. I literally see Him move in my life now that I am giving it more attention and learning to take each day as it comes…resting in the knowledge that God has got this. The creator of Heaven and Earth has me under his wings and firmly in place for his will and destiny for my life. X love ya Kate
Timea Kulcsar The Flow Experience is absolutely my life saver. The community, the tools, the support, the collective energy is what lifts me up. check out my free 7 days of flow email series. There are some amazing tools in there. Lots of people have said it’s created amazing shifts and peace within them. Www.flow-experience.com/7-days-of-flow
Frances Amanda Briggs Side swipes are instant feedback signals to rest, stop, sit, listen before taking action. I tend to approach adversity with curiosity to learn and evolve. I turn to self-care for comfort and clarity. I enjoy massages, journaling, EFT, mindfulness, eating plant and raw with loads of sleep. I hibernate and usually emerge solid and centered afterwards…
Kirsten Kennedy Gratitude for every day. Release the need to drive goals and control. Trust you will get there anyhow, this is an interesting detour worth exploring. Feel the flow, smile…. aaaaand go!
Wendy Ward Kate, thank you putting this inquiry out. It is so easy to become disassociated and disconnected. These are deeply unsettling times. It is hard to BE WITH such despondency, despair and confusion, to sit with the collective grief, to witness division and hatred, to live so close to the edge of insanity. It is easier to numb the pain, distract oneself, remain in denial, etc etc.

For me, and your question has caused me to reflect, these things are helping:
* Being weirdly comfortable not having a frigging clue most of the time what is going on. Taking the next small step into the unknown. Trusting my intuition.
* Coming back to my body, to sensation, again and again. This is helping me get out of my head. It’s like constantly noticing when my attention is focused outward and bringing it back inwards. Being aware of the breath as much as possible throughout the day. What do the sages keep reminding us: we are who we are looking for. Coming home to myself.
* Running the BARS – amazing – helps defrag the brain! For me, it has reduced my distractability in remarkable ways.
* Grounding. Lots of this. Walking bare feet. Being in nature. Literally resting, lying down, being held by the earth. Tree Meditation so wonderful.
* Stillness and silence. Sensing this stillness and silence every time I turn my gaze inwards.
* Being open to or allowing emotion to move through me – actually feeling stuff!
* Not taking things personally (harder said than done).
* Lots of chakra work. Keeping my heart open. Prayer and meditation. Choosing to believe, at the deepest level, that I am fully supported by the Universe. Mind is Resilient.
* Avoiding alcohol and nicotine. Letting go of these old friends almost entirely – body simply can’t handle. Big shifts as a result.
* Trying to take 100% responsibility for what I am thinking and what I am creating. This is the bit I CAN do when all else in world threatens to overwhelm.
* Sweat Lodge – monthly sweat – awesome community.
* Mates like you! Holding space for each other.

Sharon Jansen August, a month where my physicality was compromised. Wake up call ‘re pace. Made a declaration out loud and to others – very liberating in the clarity it brings to do this. Repositioning for the rest of the year, opening up space, creating ease and putting self first.
Wendy Nagel Sending love to you Kate! It feels like there is a lot of shedding going on…be it old patterns to allow for new…or just being caught up in all the external noise…meditate, meditate, meditate…find the stillness inside!  It feels rough, but so worth it…the key is in the letting go
Natalie Uren Today … really feeling the effects of long-term caring for my parents. About to go to yoga
Candice Wasserfall-Somerville Life is hard right now with so many sick friend and family but we have been taking the time to enjoy the small things in life. We sit in the mornings together and enjoy the birds singing while we drink our coffee. We are making memories with concerts ( Jonny Clegg ) and holidays. We are also starting a family Happiness journal to remind us of the good things that have happened during the day/ week. A photo album is also good to capture the good times of the year. It’s great to get rid of stuff, be free and have more time as there is less to clean! Surf that wave 
Lynne Loggie Kate, I so appreciate the public question and the tremendously insightful & helpful responses. Challenged as never before, I’m holding on tightly to authentic awareness, trusting that time and flow will do what it does so well, for those who observe its brilliance. Thank you and continued blessings!
Fiona Aucamp Finding the new phase of our lives daunting. Feel like I am taking more steps back than forward. Feeling disoriented and unstable. Doubts flooding through my mind…..
Adele Green I was processing yesterday, but whatever was there is shed. Feeling fantastic.
Peter du Toit These concepts had the most profound impact on me when I first heard them and may be useful to others too in the context of your question. Enjoy
Jocelyn Broderick Feeling a bit battered physically, energetically, emotionally. So much change. Big decisions. Big shifts. Transition 
Trudie Bartholomew – Translife It is full moon … and recently the end of the Mercury Retrograde
Rivashnee Singh Hey Kate, so there….being swept away. Continuance from our personal messages of late….. Changing life stage whilst going through the whirlwind of personal, emotional, business and life transformation at the same time is all consuming. I have to say your blogs and constant snippets in various forms always refreshing.
Kate Emmerson shew this thread has certainly hit a spot with so many of you. Thanks for your responses have warmed my heart! Spread the post into your worlds so other people you think might need it too can access it from your timeline?
Ursula Barnard Jacobs Sometimes people cannot let the sun shine upon others…some might say it is jealousy…manipulation….spiritual warfare. Regardless, let your light shine. You are probably on the verge of a breakthrough
NEED SUPPORT TO SHIFT YOUR LIFE?
Do you need some support from me and if so what might you need? Just drop me a line – perhaps it’s time to join my Cappuccino Challenge to learn how to fall in love with yourself again? Just R397 for 30 days! CLICK HERE  
Or perhaps you are ready to really put yourself and your life on the line and UP THE ANTE by joining my next Mastermind group.  Exponential shifts with just 6 people in a group. By application only.  Mail me now as next group start in a few weeks!

Courageous conversations blah blah blah…

By Coaching Tips 'n Tools, Insights to help you #quickshift, Selling Your Home

How can you have the right conversations  – so it’s not all bla bla bla and a mouthful of teeth!

There is an incredible POWER and emotional release that comes from having COURAGEOUS CONVERSATIONS. And more often than not you have to have a different perspective to allow yourself to even go there. In the fascinating world of CLUTTER that I “play” in, I believe that holding on to things in the emotional realm can carry more weight than all the contents of your entire house, or office. Hundreds of kilograms! It is tangible, heavy, debilitating and will always keep you STUCK IN THE PAST. If you feel like your life is being ruled and ruined by others, by things that have transpired in your life perhaps it’s time to take a long hard look at what YOU NEED to do now to heal and release yourself from the pain of what you are holding onto.

Do you need to have any courageous conversations in your life? Do you even know what they are when I say the word?

When I have the privilege of sharing time with audiences as their speaker I will often get hundreds of people in a room to put their hands on their hearts, or do an old fashioned “pinkie swear” – attaching little fingers to their best friend or colleague – as a public commitment to clear out heavy emotional clutter. That’s the first step after being honest enough to admit that you even need to have one. So getting a room full of people on their feet to bravely share the courageous conversation they need to have in their life, can be an immense turning point. All too often we cannot even get to the point to ADMIT to ourselves that there is a conversation to be had, because it so much easier to stay on THIS side of the conversation. It’s safer. We also find all sorts of excuses, some conscious and others underlying that drive our behaviours unbeknownst to us …

 

We are too BUSY

Too lazy

Too scared

Too locked in victim mode

Everyone else needs me right now

It will change if I just let it “be” and not rock the boat

Bla bla bla

Coming “clean” and being honest with yourself and others will positively effect you on all levels and will feel like an immense fog lifting. It won’t necessary solve it all immediately, but no longer having to hide and keep up the façade will offer some relief to your heart and soul.

 

What is a courageous conversation?

It is probably the one you DO NOT WANT TO HAVE. The one that fills you with the most dread, fear or embarrassment. Or the one that may possibly change your life the most through the risk and guts it requires from you. Or the one that may require you to walk away from people and places you love. The one that can turn the pit of your stomach to acid and your legs to jelly in a flash. The one that feels like it will rip you apart even just thinking about it.

 

 Yep…the one you need to have!

OFTEN IT IS WITH YOURSELF!

 

You already know which one it is you need to have as you are reading this blog…but knowing humans pretty well, including myself, you are probably pushing it aside right now and pretending it’s not THE one to have… all the fear kicks in…I know what we do as I have been there!!

 

 Here are a few examples of “opening lines” for these big ol’ chats

  • I resent how much you work over the weekends, every weekend
  • I have been having an affair for the past 2 years
  • I am no longer in love with you, even though I love you
  • I need to go into debt review and we may lose the house
  • I have been making use of internet porn
  • I am an alcoholic
  • I’m sorry that I ……
  • I’m angry at you for being absent in the kids lives
  • I am illegal in this county and want to apply for legal residency
  • I stole money from you ten years ago
  • I have just been retrenched and I am terrified to talk about it
  • You are a bully and I’m scared of you
  • I really need to be acknowledged for my hard work on this project
  • I love you and …will you marry me?
  • I want to sell this house and move to another country
  • You still owe me that money you borrowed and its affecting our friendship
  • I can no longer tolerate your abuse of animals and am reporting you to the SPCA

 

 What are the real clues you need a courageous conversation?

  • There is something that hangs over you every single day causing stress
  • You are hiding something from someone / several people
  • There is a feeling of shame, embarrassment, guilt, fear etc
  • You are angry or even slightly annoyed with someone
  • The mere thought of having the conversation leaves you sweaty or anxious
  • There is huge potential risk attached to the conversation
  • You feel like you could “lose” something dear to you
  • It is easier NOT to have the conversation ‘cos it is very uncomfortable!

 

Lots of us will say…. ah Kate you know I HAVE dealt with this, it is better to let sleeping dogs lie, don’t open the can of worms, it is not worth the risk, I will deal with this on my own, I’m not good with being honest etc. We have a hundred valid excuses. But if there are still any emotions that come up for you that have not been dealt with or addressed, it is always better out than buried inside you. The amount of energy it requires to keep something hidden is like holding a big beach ball under water…it always wants to pop up and bounce back on top of the water.

 

Is there a real RISK?

Of course there is a risk.

Let’s be real here, but life is risky every single day!

If you are trying to live your life without any risk at all, you are not truly living, and if you are trying to live your life everyday playing it too safe, you die metaphorically LONG before your death.

 

Risk is not always a bad thing!

 

There is a potentially positive risk that the outcome will be way better than you can ever have imagined, or at the very least you get to feel the relief at having had the conversation and be able to move on. But yes, to be brutally honest in some instances the outcome could be your worst nightmare. The very thing you are trying to avoid hence one of the biggest reasons you are NOT having the conversation. But at what cost to you? You may lose your job, your partner, go to jail, become bankrupt, get evicted, become the subject of a scandal and even lose friends.

But what about doing the right thing for the right reasons and being fearless to set yourself free?

Sometimes you may even need to get professional advice before having a courageous conversation. But in my experience the reward usually outweighs the risk.

You have to be willing to walk through the fire to the other side….

 

RIGHT – THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT YOU NEED TO DO IN ORDER TO GET STARTED!
Yup, RIGHT NOW!

 

I am so passionate about this concept of LIVING FREE FROM ANXIETY and EMOTIONAL CLUTTER- releasing ourselves from all the YUCKY STUFF that holds our hearts back, causes pain and steals our power, that for me it all starts with being HONEST.

And sometimes for that, we need to create SPACE!

Sign up for my latest series- THE STRATEGIC POWER OF DISCONNECTING.
No charge, just my thoughts that have worked for me and clients!

 

 

 

The Minimalist Manifesto

By Transformational Journeys, Transformational thoughts

Hello everyone, today’s Blog also has a V-Log which means a short video done made in my Beloved Barrydale where my heart SINGS with glee. Just to share what wonderful projects I’m up to this year to 10 X my own life, business and message to help YOU shift YOUR life. I have been put on notice to blog and video more often from now on, as my two books CLEAR YOUR CLUTTER and DITCH YOUR GLITCH are about to be published internationally and I need to stay way more connected with all of you.  You are going to want to follow this journey as I find what stuff people store and hoard in different countries, the types of clutter, how people live, what their glitches are etc. Make sure you subscribe to my Blog on the feed on this page. I’ll update you as I go along…

Watch the video and then keep reading…

https://youtu.be/KuP2zTUpnMc

 

Here is the HONEST pic of what I’m travelling with as I LIVE LIGHT LIVE LARGE,  and how I pack my suitcase so I can literally dress out my case – I have 6 smart outfits, several casual, high heels, dancing salsa shoes, gym and yoga gear – And I STILL haven’t worn everything in my case and it’s been just a few days short of  a month already!

2016-01-22 16.40.072016-02-09 08.03.13 HDR

I have the bare minimum of stuff I am keeping that in a friends storage (that in itself is a little weird).

*A Batisse piece of art wrapped that I LOVE
*The big box contains more Art, as well as two bedspread quilts my nan hand made when I was a teenager – I used to help her cut out and sew, so yes I’m still sentimental even though a minimalist, organized and travel light
*1st white box is all my SARS  tax type stuff – Half of which is my brothers!
* 2nd white box is my very precious treasured stuff. And most of that box if heart shaped ROCKS I have collected from beaches all around the world (not in pic they were being washed for storage!

2016-01-15 09.37.33 2016-01-22 09.32.59

I literally sold, donated, re-gifted or ditched anything else I deemed that no longer serves me!

And my beloved Stripey boi looks so stressed in his new home – can you tell? No-one else can sit on the couch!

2016-02-19 10.30.11

SO – the real deal is what are YOU doing to live YOUR MAGNIFICENT LIFE?

Drop me a line if I can help you in ANY way – whether to get started, take stock, write a book, reconfigure your entire life, clear our your home, come and do a talk at your company or women’s group. I’m traveling the world following THE MINIMALIST MANIFESTO so no place is out of my way 🙂 and I am working online with people in every corner of the globe!

If you need to sign up for one of my programmes – do so here on www.kate-emmerson.com and come and connect with me on Facebook HERE